What is FAMILY Rules?
Dr. Matthew Johnson entered the mental
health field in 1982. At that time, he worked in a group home
setting, a residential treatment setting, and an inpatient
psychiatric hospital. Why? Well, he wanted as much experience as
possible on his Resume/Vita to look like a good candidate for
graduate school. Also, he needed the money.
While working in the treatment facilities,
he noticed that they would eventually stabilize a child’s
attitudes and behaviors and get them to the point where the
whole treatment team thought the child was ready to be
discharged. The parents thought the child was ready to be
discharge. The child thought he/she was ready to be discharged.
So they were all in agreement and discharged the child.
Then two or three months later after
discharging the child, the parents would call the treatment
facility complaining, sometimes yelling and screaming at the
professionals, that their child was right back to where they
were (both attitudes and behaviors) before they admitted their
child into our treatment facility months earlier. The
professional staff would shrug their shoulders, blame the
parents, and keep the treatment conveyor belt going even though
the phone calls kept coming in.
Dr. Johnson saw this pattern developing
early in his professional career and couldn’t understand what
was going on. The child’s attitudes and behaviors were
stabilized. Everyone was in agreement that he/she was ready to
be discharged from treatment. Why did the kids keep going back
down the dysfunctional toilet after discharge? Finally, the
“Epiphany”!!! The “Ah ha” moment!!! The “light bulb’ came on!
The “clouds parted, the light shown down, the angels sang”…..
Dr. Johnson figured it out!!! Yahoo!!!
Dr. Johnson realized that when an out of
control child was brought into the group home, the residential
treatment facility, or the inpatient psychiatric facility, the
Primary Modality of Intervention with the child was a system of
order and structure that was “correctly and consistently”
implemented over time. Otherwise, known as Behavior
Modification. The child knew what it took to go from Level One
to Level Two to Level Three to Level Four to Level Five and
eventually to being discharged from the treatment facility. The
child knew what it took to get busted back down a level or two
or all the way back down to Level One to start all over again.
Once the child’s attitudes and behaviors were stabilized, then
the Secondary Modality of Intervention was the “Touchy Feely”
stuff (i.e., The Psychodynamic Therapies). First – Behavior
Modification. Once stabilized, second – Touchy Feely.
Now, what you’re about to read is the
“Epiphany”!!! This is what Dr. Johnson figured out long ago in
1987. This is where the treatment facilities blew it. What did
the facilities do when they had the parents in one night a week
for “Family Night” or “Parenting Night”? They reversed the
intervention strategies!!! They had the opportunity to teach the
parents to do in their homes what the professionals were doing
in their facilities to stabilize their child’s attitudes and
behaviors and the professionals dropped the ball because they
reversed the intervention strategies. They did “Touchy Feely”
first instead of teaching the parents how to do a “Behavior
Modification” program in their homes.
Then, one week before discharge, the
professionals helped the parents and the child to “negotiate” or
“compromise” with one another while hammering out a bogus “Home
Contract” that has holes so big in it that you can drive trucks
through it. Also, the bogus “Home Contract” is philosophically
flawed and doomed to fail because it does fail every time. Those
“Home Contracts” never ever work. Why? Because they operate by
the philosophy of “King Arthur’s Round Table” (i.e., one person,
one voice, one vote). The “Home Contract” treats parents and
kids as if they’re equals sitting around “King Arthur’s Round
Table”. In the end, the bogus “Home Contract” undermines
parental authority in the home by leading the child to believe
that he/she has equality with their parents (i.e., that their
parents must “negotiate” or “compromise” with them). No bloody
way!!! Stop the insanity!!!
Dr. Johnson realized that parents needed to
be taught how to used a “Behavior Modification” program in their
home and that the philosophy of “King Arthur’s Round Table” was
setting families up to fail when the child returned home from
treatment. Therefore, in 1987, Dr. Johnson took approximately
200 volunteer families over a two-year period of time and began
putting together a “Behavior Modification” program that would
work effectively in the home. They tried this, it worked, and
they kept it. They tried that, it didn’t work, and they got rid
of it. After working with 200 volunteer families over a two-year
period of time “trying this” and “trying that”, Dr. Johnson
finally came up with an effective “one size fits all” parenting
program that helps moms and dads to do in their homes what the
treatment facilities were doing to stabilize the attitudes and
behaviors of their “out of control” children.
In a nutshell, “Positive Parenting with a
Plan: FAMILY Rules” is a research-based parenting program that
really, really, really works. Why? Well, there are a couple
reasons why: (1) it was not formed in an “Ivory Tower” on a
university campus setting. Rather, it was formed in the foxholes
and trenches on the “Battlefield of Parental Warfare” with input
from real living, breathing moms, dads, and kids; (2) it is
philosophically based in the “Hierarchy Model” rather than “King
Arthur’s Round Table”. In other words, this parenting program
supports “parental authority” in the home rather than
undermining it like other parenting programs do; and (3) This
parenting program targets the entire “family system” for change
– not just the child(ren). Everyone is required to improve on
changing their attitudes and behaviors in a positive direction.
Everyone wins with the “Positive Parenting with a Plan: FAMILY
Rules” parenting program!!!
Dr. Johnson has been teaching this parenting program since 1987.
After much pressure from professionals and parents to write a
book, he finally wrote the book in 2000. Since 2001, he’s been
speaking in 80 cities per year all over the USA, Canada, and
Europe. He has trained over 50,000 professionals on how to work
with parents with “out of control” children. “Positive Parenting
with a Plan: FAMILY Rules” is now being used by group homes,
treatment facilities, psychiatric research hospitals, private
practitioners, pediatricians, probation officers, public and
private schools, churches and synagogues, divorce courts, foster
care systems, child protective services agencies, and by
thousands of parents across the USA. Finally, even parents in
Europe, Africa, South America, and Australia are benefiting from
using “Positive Parenting with a Plan: FAMILY Rules” in their
homes too.
As a result of speaking around the USA, Canada, and Europe in 80
cities per year since 2001, some agencies have grabbed a hold of
Dr. Johnson’s parenting program, used it in their facilities,
and have conducted their own research studies. Here are two
examples:
• In the State of Kentucky, the Christian
Care Communities at Woodlawn implemented the “Positive
Parenting” program in their facilities in 2005. They conducted a
one year study under the supervision of Denise Greenhalgh. The
results revealed that there was a significant improvement in the
attitudes, behaviors, and compliance with their residents when
compared to other behavior modification programs that had been
used in their facilities in the past. In short, they reported a
97% improvement rate for the residents involved in the one year
study (information provided by Denise Greenhalgh, Former
Supervisor and Employee at CCC at Woodlawn).
• In September of 2005, while completing
the “networking” time at the beginning of Dr. Johnson’s seminar
in Atlanta GA, Dr. David Anthony stood up and shared that their
agency, Family Intervention Specialists, Inc., employs 57
counselors throughout 11 counties in the state of Georgia. He
then told the seminar attendees that they have been using
“Positive Parenting with a Plan/FAMILY Rules” for the past 2
years with their juvenile clients and families (i.e., from 2003
to 2005). He shared that their research demonstrated that their
families have an 85% success rate with this program (i.e., the
juvenile offenders are not reoffending). Finally, he stated that
they would probably have a 95% success rate if they could weed
out the hardened offenders. He expressed a hope that “Positive
Parenting/ FAMILY Rules” might eventually become the mandated
program of choice in the state of Georgia when working with
juvenile offenders and their families. Note: In April of 2007,
while speaking in Atlanta GA again, Dr. Johnson ran into a
former employee of Family Intervention Specialists (mentioned
above) who told him that the program continued to work well.
Matter of fact, she said it worked so well that she took it to
the new agency she’s now working for in Georgia. The parenting
program is working well there too.
In summary, “Positive Parenting with a
Plan/FAMILY Rules” works because of the input from many moms,
dads, and kids during the first two years of developing the
program. It works because it supports and promotes parental
authority through the use of the “Hierarchy Model” rather than
“King Arthur’s Round Table”. It works because the philosophical
foundation of the parenting program has been built upon a rock
rather than sinking sand (i.e., There are a lot of parenting
programs out there that look good, sound good, smell good, and
feel good but they’re philosophically flawed because their
philosophical foundations have been built upon sinking sand and
ultimately undermine adult authority in the home, school, and in
the community). It works because it targets the whole family
system for changing their attitudes and behaviors – not just the
child(ren). Finally, it works because it takes “good old
fashioned parenting” and puts it together in a new and improved
package, minus corporal punishment, and provides order and
structure in the home for parenting which is the chemo therapy
needed to eliminate the dysfunctional cancer in your home. There
is no other parenting program out there like this one. If you
want things to actually change in your home with a spelled out
game plan for implementing the program from A-Z, then you’ve
finally found it. If you “correctly and consistently” implement
this program in your home, then expect things to get a whole lot
better. Your quest is over. You have arrived. Congratulations!!! |
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